"Pletcher and Bartolameolli are undisputed experts on the subject of co-sex addiction.  They know more about it than anyone I know and have presented  an expose that with great clarity supersedes anything I have read before."

– John Bradshaw

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Jealousy and envy will fade....

In our 12 step recovery promises, we are told of many manifestations that will occur in our lives, some of which we can't imagine in the beginning. Over time, as we willingly surrender ourselves to the discipline of the 12 steps, we will experiences miracles and promises manifesting in our lives. There will be transformation. It's a promise.

As I look back over my many years working a recovery program and staying committed to the discipline of the 12 steps, I see clearly how my life has been transformed. I trust myself and others. I trust my Higher Power and know that as I turn things over, all will be well. Financial insecurity is almost completely gone and I live with a sense of prosperity and abundance. Today my pain has become experience, strength and hope to share with others. I am able to celebrate the joys and accomplishments of those closest to me and in my own life.

There is, on occasion, still a feeling of jealousy and envy that comes over me from time to time. We have a promise that states, "jealousy and envy will fade." When I embrace the beautiful communities of women in my life, I find there are moments of envy for what they have created and attracted. I sense my own jealousy and pettiness arise. It is a moment of humility and awareness.

My life is not perfect, nor do I practice the 12 steps and principles perfectly. I do, however, believe that I am on a journey. When I am reminded of the places still to be healed by the promises of the program, I surrender once again and embrace the sense of humility as one on the journey does from time to time. I know there is more work that the Divine has to do within me. Rigorous honest is the opening to this healing and offering to others my own challenges and transformations empowers and inspires.

Blessings on your journey,

Thursday, February 9, 2012


One of the greatest gifts of 12 step recovery is learning to parent our own children and ourselves with new skills. As we develop the emotional capacity to feel and hold our emotions within, we are able then to choose how to respond to any given situation. We are able to have kindness and respect when our children are angry or sad, teaching them to honor these emotions, letting them be informative but not acting them out without purpose or clear intention. In developing emotional intelligence, we create choices for ourselves. We use our energy as power and direct it to accomplish what we desire, honoring our own values along the way.

Re-parenting ourselves comes in recovery as well. We become nurturing, aware, respectful, compassion women and men and we give this attention to ourselves. We learn to set boundaries around our own behavior internally and externally to protect and empower ourselves in relationships with other.

There is grief that often surfaces to be released about the ways in which we did not receive as children what we needed and wanted. While we can consciously let this go, we can consciously choose self-loving behaviors as adults. It's never too late to have a happy childhood.



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